Peter Arthur Ellis 1942 – 2015

Its been quite a week!!!!

Last Sunday I received a call from my mum, saying that my dad was being taken to hospital by ambulance  and could I meet him there …..

 

My father has lived with Parkinsonism for the last few years and has been declining with each passing month.

He fought bravely this past week and allowed us to be by his side each day until he passed away peacefully on Friday with my brother and my daughter by his side.  They held his hands and comforted him through his last breaths.

My sister and I and my mother had been with Dad all week, my brother came on Wednesday and my daughter came on Monday, Tuesday went back to her home 3 hours away and came back again on Thursday and stayed with him.  I know..way too much detail 😀

I was asked to write something for his service, I didn’t have time to complete it, but I wanted to share it here.

My father wasn’t always available when I was growing up, I didn’t make that any easier for him, I gave both my parents a run for their money…

I never listened, Dad would say, while we watched the loons on the lake (laughing birds we called them) he would say, stay away from the rocks you might fall in the water..did I listen? No… Splash.  Angela be careful the bbq is hot…again did I listen,  No, required a trip to emerg with a terrible burn on my arm…

Well this week I listened.

In the last year or so dad was unable to speak.  But it didn’t stop him from communicating. Dad loved to talk, once you got him started you knew you’d better pull up a comfy chair.

I can’t imagine his frustration, but he pushed through as Parkinson’s slowly took his abilities away, first his ability to walk, then his speech, motor skills started to fail, he was eating pureed foods, he was often in pain but he still maintained his ability to smile and make those around him smile.

He used those beautiful blue eyes of his, facial expressions, lots of smiles and hand gestures to let you know what he needed or how his was feeling.

If I hadn’t visited in a while boy did I hear about it!!!  He stared me down brows furrowed and refused to acknowledge me, only lasted moments but felt like a life time!

This past week he became ill and was admitted in to hospital.   He took his time in typical Ellis style, just took his time 😀  he allowed us this time with him, when he needed us the most and when we needed him.

We were watching silly videos online, telling jokes, reminiscing, cooling his head with cool damp facecloths and using our warped humor which we learned from him, telling him he looked like a little Amish girl or a creature off of star wars with all the sound effects included, he loved it smiling through his pain and high fever, we continued caring for him until his final breath with him guiding us all the way.

He needed us there to hold his hands, they were stuck in a fist like position with a little cushion wedged between so he wouldn’t hurt himself, we removed them so we could hold his hands properly, sliding our hands inside the gap, as soon as one of us moved our hands his eyes would open and back to hand holding, his eyes would close.

I sat with him one night early in the week and he kept pointing his hands together, finally I figured it out he wanted me to hold his hands, we both fell asleep.

We all had special moments with Dad like this throughout the week.

We also had some really tough decisions to make on his behalf , I know he is proud of us as we are of him.

I cant’ thank him enough for reminding us, to keep fighting , keep smiling, continue to be kind no matter what, continue to treat people with dignity and respect and most of all he taught us the great power of  love.

I’ll miss my father, he was a good , kind caring man, I’m at peace with his passing, I have no regrets other than I didn’t have enough time with him, nothing was left unsaid.

We told him we loved him and that we knew he loved us.

He’ll be missed by many, his family and his extended family at the long-term care facility he called home.

We are truly blessed he allowed us to help him on his journey “home”. He passed peacefully on February 13.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sunday Shave

Daughter #3 was heading for the tub and asked if we had any shave gel..
I said
” Ooops sorry honey, I bought wine instead of shave gel, use peanut butter”.

“OMG mother!”  Seriously?!

“Ya sorry honey, I bought wine instead”

“Nooooo,  I meant peanut butter , seriously mother?!”

” Your grandmother used to do this to me all the time,
Harvey’s Bristol Cream instead of shave gel,
that’s when I learned about peanut butter shave gel,what can I say”

“OMG, mother!

Just try it!

pb

Believe it or not, peanut butter makes a great shaving gel.
Just apply it like you would apply the gel, and shave as normal.
It works just as well and anyone that has bought a container of shaving gel will know, it is a hell of a lot cheaper.
The end result is a very smooth shave and, as a bonus, the oils in the peanut butter are very good for your skin,
so you don’t need to spend even more money on moisturizer for your legs or face!!!!

Your welcome 😀

 

Oh, so not funny!

I finally dragged myself out of bed this morning after hitting snooze a few times and stumbled to the kitchen for my coffee and proceeded to take  the dogs outside.
When I came in I thought to myself,  
“gee I think I’d like some toast and peanut butter”…

and this is what I found!!!

009

Daughter #1 has left on her first real vacation as an adult.

She’s gone to Cuba, Iberostar Laguna Azul to be exact 😀

Lucky ducky!

She left this gift for me in the cupboard!

Graffiti on my pb jar?!

Really!

😀 😀 😀

Can’t wait for her to come home…

The 24th Birthday Guilt trip!

Today is Daughter #1’s Birthday she is turning 24.

stac and adam

Daughter #1  informed her aging grandmother, beautifully caring Aunt and her beloved mother that she would be unable to join them for a birthday dinner celebration as she was having dinner with her father.  (me ex-hubby) 😀

Well that’s fine, it is her birthday and she can choose who she’d like to spend it with……:D

I sent my daughter this text last night in classic “mum of the year” style, it is an art that my mother passed down to me as a young child, has the knack of “guilting” you into doing things by saying things like “it would be lovely if you could join us, we don’t often get together as whole family anymore, but if your too busy, we’ll all understand”  😀 She is the queen of guilt trips!

Here is why I will be up for Mother of the Year award this year:

“Only one more sleep until your birthday, life hasn’t been the same since the day you were born, I understand you are spending time with your father on the day of your birth , when I went through hours of agonizing pain, had my beautiful young body distorted and stretched and damn near lost my life for the second time, changed your poopy diapers, endured many sleepless days and nights while you suffered from colic, cleaned up your projectile vomit and endured your wicked tantrums, while all the while your father drank beers with the boys!!  Enjoy your dinner with Dad!!!  LoL!!”

her response was:

“Grrrr.”

I phoned her shortly afterwards and we both had a good laugh!

This morning I posted a birthday wish on her facebook wall:

“Happy Birthday Anastasia!!! Hope you have a wonderful day!!! I am so proud of the woman you are becoming and I smile everyday because you are my daughter, and then I laugh because there is nothing you can do about it!!!! I Love you very much! xoxoxoxoxo Have an amazing Day, and say hi to Dad for me tonight !”

I wonder if they’ll have birthday cake?  I have cake here….hmmm 😀

As many of you know, my family is a funny bunch, we love each other to the moon and back but we also love to tease and antagonize each other.

Happy Happy Birthday Daughter #1 hope it was a good one!!

Hope you’ve all had an awesome day like I have 😀

≈Laugh loudly, Love generously, Care deeply, Speak kindly≈